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Photo taken at Plitvice National Park, Croatia by Vibhor Dhote Oh! What are these days I have found myself in! The bagpacks I carry n...

Sunday, September 28, 2014

Mumbai, Movies and My Last Weekend



When I had just started blogging I planned to write fictions only. Eventually, poems happened and then articles. True stories, there were none until “Was She Raped?” happened. People reveal their inner selves in their blogs and I still do not have the guts to. Nor do I intend to (Nope, I don’t :-P).
But then sometimes a diary knows too much of you and you just want it (which is basically you) to shut up. These are the times when you need to blog. Acknowledging the fact that not many people read your blog helps you even more (Not now, they don’t. The number of my readers, of late, has only decreased :-/)

It so happened last weekend that I just couldn’t face my diary no matter how much I tried. So at my time of despair, I just couldn’t find the solace of it. I couldn’t because I didn’t want to, being aware of the fact that confronting it, would only break me down into smaller pieces. Yes, I was broken and I very much wanted to escape the fact and yet, face it at the same time.  I had arguments and fights with almost everyone I cared for. I had no one to talk to. I just spent my Friday night burying my head on my pillow and crying. Those were not tears of being sad. Although I was sad, what had bothered me was the fact that I was behaving like a coward. There were people pestering me and I was more scared than angry, unable to muster up the courage to give them a thrashing they would remember. No, that’s not really me; when people give me a hard time I usually try to return them the favour. But last weekend (and at other times in history) I just couldn’t. I felt vulnerable and weak being a woman(Oh, I had no reason to be, I know now). So that was me- a cry baby, whining and tearful, spending a Friday night like a miserable person.

The next morning I woke up, I decided to chuck it all and go for a movie instead. I was never a movie buff nor am I now. But somehow, I discovered, watching a movie in a hall just cheers me up. So that was the antidote, I think, I needed.

Since I had a row with most of my friends, I didn’t want to talk to others either. I decided to go alone for the movies. I usually love my own company and I never shy away from going to restaurants or movies alone, but last weekend was different. Although it was my choice, but I was sad too.
The first movie I picked was Disney’s Khoobsurat at Wonder Mall in Thane. I travelled in a train so crowded that you can hardly breathe, just because the prices were cheaper there (I’m an IT person, remember :-P).

The problem when you’re sad is that you cry for no apparent reason and even smaller issues seem bigger. So when on the big screen they were playing Preet, I was wiping tears off my cheeks. Not that the movie was so emotional but I was just so sad. When I came out of the hall as the movie was over, I realized my mood was a lot lighter. No wonder, I liked the movie.

The second antidote (which usually was my first) is food. I helped myself with some gorgeous Italian food at Pizza Hut.


By this time, I realized that probably there’s no substitute to good food.


The next movie to watch was a Telugu movie named Aagadu at Big Cinemas in Vashi. No, I do not know what Aagadu means but I had to watch it as my friends insisted I go with them (they realized I was upset and so they insisted even more). The movie didn’t make much difference but I had a good time laughing at the jokes. The next movie was Daawat-E-Ishq in a hall very near to my house.

I loved Daawat-E-Ishq for three reasons –
1. Kebabs <3
2. Biryani <3 <3
3. Firni 
4. Parineeti being “Hard-core Non (Veg)” :-D
5. All the other food items they had

Apart from these reasons, the other reason was– fighting against the social evil they call as “gift” or “help” (dowry, for those who do not know the core message of the movie).

The day ended at 3:00am the next morning when I finished watching Disney’s Frozen – one of the best movies ever. I loved it the way Disney considered sibling’s love too as true love and not just the plain old idea of a “true love’s kiss”. Also, they broke the myth about love at first sight being true love (Shakespearean Theory) because let’s be honest, the probability that a handsome stranger is someone trustworthy is just very less. Also, your “Prince Charming” may not actually be a prince by blood but can be an orphan adopted by trolls too.


Okay, I admit it, I’m a girl and unlike earlier times, these two Disney movies plus Daawat-e-Ishq totally spoiled me :-P.

Lessons I learned over my last weekend –

1. Reality may disappoint, but movies and food will always help. :-P
2. Going for a date via Mumbai ki local train is a bad idea because it will simply make you end up smelly and sweaty unless you are the Santoor soap girl :-P
3. Never spend more than 1/15th of a second crying for people who do not care for you even 1/100th of the tears you want to spend on them (I hope this sentence makes sense)
4. In case they do, patch up the differences as soon as you can. Say sorry if you have to. Life is too small to live with grudges, tears or broken friendships.
5. I understand that you can be happier if you simply don’t give a damn. But sometimes giving a damn is just so beautiful that you can’t help but give a damn. (Give a damn :D)

It took me a weekend to recover but by Monday I was back to being myself - I mended the fights and did what I should have done on Friday eve itself instead of crying. But if I hadn’t cried, I would have missed spending time with these nice movies, wouldn’t I?

Monday, September 22, 2014

Cursed

My brave warrior,
Thou art no Lazarus.
Thou will not resurrect.
Thou dig thy own grave.
Thou cannot bequeath
Thy slayings to the soil.
The soil shall not bury
Thy charred soul.
Eden waits not for thou.
Thy scars won't go;
They won't leave,
They won't heal.
Wear them as a curse.
Wear them as a curse
Till thy corpse rot.
Thy soul shall suffer
While the blood-stained
Weeds will shout,
"Wear it as a curse,
Wear it as a curse!"

Thursday, September 18, 2014

Blood Red

From a tiny crack
On the lush wrist,
Out, flowed
A thick liquid,
Crimson coloured,
From the deepest
Of the bluest
Of veins in it.
"Let us go,"
Said each drop
That dripped on
The floor,
As it gave away
Its hue.
"Let us leave too,"
The liquid screamed
From within.
The floor
Embraced
Each drop that spread
And so it
Turned
Slowly, blood-red

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Like a Piece of Paper

She stares at the blank paper
Crumbled a million times,
Like her own life.
She stares at the glass of wine,
As clear as her heart could be,
Sparkling only when it should -
Every time you look at it.
He looks at the mess she is now,
Oh, didn't he love her once,
For the tears and the scars?
Time plays its part
As it moves on,
He too moves on
And she, like the paper
She holds,
Holds a life that needs
Someone to unfold it,
To wipe the wrinkles
Off her pale white face.
A tear-drop finds its way
To her soul, bruised,
He laughs and goes off
While she awaits 
Another tragedy...

Monday, September 15, 2014

I Dare Not

Ever tried dreaming of those broken shards again?
Nay, I dare not.
Not now, now that I dwell in this forest
Of that what cannot be found,
Of the pieces she picked up
And stubbed on each branch
Of the tree I so loved.

Ever found those pieces?
They say they're gone now,
Lost in the forest of memories.
They say, love still remains;
I see fire, I see destruction
And a dark night of vengeance.
To dream again of those shards
I dare not,
I dare not.

Monday, September 8, 2014

The Liebster Blog Award I and II




So I just found it out today that Geeta Nair (http://geetaavij.wordpress.com) nominated me for THE LIEBSTER BLOG AWARD (liebster meaning “favourite” in German, which reminds me of the first German sentence I learnt - ich liebe dich :-D) last year.
 Also on the same month of November 2013, I was nominated for this award by Bhavya Kaushik (http://bhavyakaushik.com/) too.
 I understand that I am too late in honouring the two nominations of the Liebster Award  but I am a big  fan of the saying – “ better late than never” , so I am going to accept it anyway.

Rules of receiving the award :

• To accept the award one must link back to the person who nominated him/ her.

• Nominate 10 more bloggers who you feel are deserving of more subscribers.
• Answer all questions posted by the nominator.
• Create 10 questions for the nominees.
• Contact the 10 nominees and inform them that they have been nominated for this prestigious award.


I further nominate the bloggers whose blogs I like.

My nominees are –

Janaki Nagaraj @ http://janakinagaraj.com/
Suresh Chandrasekaran @ http://jambudweepam.blogspot.com/
Prabhat Singh www.prabhateinstein.com
Himanshu Chhabra www.purplepenblogs.in/
Dhristy Dasgupta @ http://www.mapleleafblog.com/

My answers to Geeta’s questions :


1)      Blogging to you means?
Ans: Saying what I want to convey to the masses in order to bring a change, Connecting to my own feelings which I don’t notice when I am not alone, revealing a side of me and not ;-)

2) You are walking alone in the middle of the night. A black cat jumps on you. Your reaction?
Ans: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa…. Infinity!!

3) The climax is nearing. You are anxious to know it. Suddenly your mother-in-law calls you saying it’s urgent. What would you do?
Ans: Climax of what? A movie? I’m going to attend a call anyway. Wait a sec, did you say mother-in-law? Umm… whoever it is, urgency comes first.

4) A day at home or a week at sea. Which would you prefer and why?
Ans: A week at sea; home-days are often, sea-days sound fun.

5) Your best companion?
Ans: Myself

6) You are in the middle of something important at office. Your spouse calls you up just to tell you he/ she loves you. Your reaction?
Ans: Spouse? I’d say “love you too” to almost anyone who calls me to say it at any time of the day, provided he/she is someone I know well. (Not to stalkers, obviously)

7) People appreciate you for?
Ans: Kindness, Boldness, Helpfulness, they say. I’m not very sure if anyone really means it. (I am quite paranoid at times) I accept their appreciation with a wide grin anyway.

8) Your musings on life in 3 sentences.
Ans: Your life is an examination, you don’t have any competitors so you can top easily but my friend,  the cut-off marks are too high.

9) The one thing you are really scared of?
Ans: Umm… I have a fear of slippery surfaces (If anybody knows what is it called in one word do let me know.). I am trying to overcome it, of late.

10) Three things you are really crazy about and why?
Ans : Reading some great lines before sleeping – they just bring peace to me for no apparent reason.
Having good food – a day spent without eating some delicious chicken is a day wasted
Diary Writing – It lifts my spirits up no matter what the situation I am in.

My answers to Bhavya’s questions -
     1.      Why did you start blogging?
Ans: To write a short story every day and get proper suggestions on it. No, it didn’t turn out the way I thought it would.
 2.      How did you choose the title of your blog and how is it relevant to what you write?
 Ans: Years before I started blogging, I was just hooked to this name – “Pens and Pages”. It was to be the name of my first book – a compilation of short stories. No, that never happened and I grew up realizing the world’s not an easy place for those who are lazy.
 3.      If you could travel anywhere in this world, where would you go?
 Ans : Everywhere
 4.      What is your favourite book and why?
 Ans : Eat, Pray, Love, The Bell Jar and Absent in the Spring – they are equally close to me and I can just relate to the protagonists on these books, feeling as if they can be no one but me.
  5.      Who is your biggest inspiration? 
Ans : I get inspired by a lot of people by their simple acts. Can’t name them all.
6. If you were writing an autobiography, what would the title be?
Ans: Let’s not hurry into naming imaginary stuffs. I am bad at naming anyway. :-P
7.      Do you have any short term/ long term goals that you’re working towards?
Ans: Short Term – Yes. Long Term – Confused. 
8.      If you could pick one character from a book to be your best friend, who would you pick and why? 
Ans : Harry Potter would make the best best-friend ever, wouldn’t he?
9.      How long have you been blogging? What was the experience like?
 Ans : Three Years. My blog has become a part of my life, I love it but I don’t show it all the time. (Sorry blog L for not loving you the way you deserve to be loved. Damn! I am pathetic.)
10.  What is one of your fondest childhood memories?
 Ans : Coming home from school and talking with my sister for an hour or two, describing the events of the day, EVERY DAY. I miss those days. No wonder, I didn’t need a diary then.

My questions to the bloggers I have nominated –

1.      When was the last moment you were unkind to someone?
2.      When was the last moment you complimented someone you do not like/appreciate?
3.      Name the blog you follow the most.
4.      What’s your favourite quote and why?
5.      What’s the last book you read?
6.      When’s the last time you wrote something creative?
7.      If you could only read books or write your own stories, what’d you choose? No, you can’t choose both.
8.      What’s your favourite poem?
9.      Did you like/dislike the questions asked to you?
10.  Why? (Ans of q. no 9)